Yes I am insane - I took the four of them to Target.

I'm not quite sure what I was thinking, other than "oh, it's 90 degrees out and Jason could use some sandals; and Sarah and Evie too!" I've sent Jason out to play in the yard in bare feet the last two days because I'm lazy it's been so hot out, and I thought today would be a good opportunity to get sandals for him and the girls - we had a busy day yesterday with the yard sale and some school fun, but Hubby left this morning for a business trip & we had the day to ourselves. So after playing in the heat for a little bit this morning (yes, those were my kids looking retarded so cute in their roller skates holding their umbrellas), we had lunch and the little ones took HUMONGOUS naps - hooray! Evie and William amused themselves watching Lady and the Tramp (so cute!) while I finally got our taxes filed (hooray - I am SO glad that is off my plate for the year!)

So, the babies woke up, I grabbed snacks and sippy cups for them, and off we went to Sally Beauty Supply (how else do I fool everyone with my age, other than covering up all the gray hairs?) and Tar-jay. Sally Beauty was bad enough, they all chattered at me incessantly, Jason (whom I'm carrying as he's wearing no shoes - again, it's hot - and I'm lazy!) is grabbing everything in my hands, and Evie is bringing me every shade of fuscia hair color to ask if she can try it - God help me, she's only 7 and wants fuscia hair - oy! Meanwhile Sarah and William (partners in crime) are oohing and ahhing over everything. I made it out of there with about 1/2 of what I needed because I got so flustered by them, but the kind Sally girl told me how good they were and how bad some other people's kids behave in the store. Well I guess that counts for something, no?

Off to Tar-jay! I had 4 things on my list: method hand soap (love it!), a soft bristled brush to scrub my outdoor cushions with, a battery for the garage door opener, and sandals for the kids.

Grabbed the soap, then continued on to look for the scrub brush a few aisles away. On the way there William touched probably a thousand different things, and Sarah fell at least twice because she would lag behind and then run to catch up. We found the scrub brushes and while I'm fondling all of them looking for the softest bristle with the largest surface area, I'm not really paying attention to the fact that the plungers are arrayed on the shelf below. By the time I realize this, they (not including Jason, as he's in the cart) have stuck 10 or more plungers all over the aisle floor. And they can't figure out how to get them back off.

On to the batteries: while I'm trying to figure out which one I need, Sarah and William (partners in crime, I'm telling you!) are rifling through some display, and Evie's chatting incessantly asking when can William get a new camera? When can she get a video camera? Can she get a DS game? How much do DS games cost? and on and on.

On to the shoe department: this was probably the most aggravating part, trying to find shoes for 3 kids in 3 different sizes - Jason's fussing, William's exploring, Sarah's trying on every pair she can find, and Evie's bringing me what are essentially $17 flip-flops - not something she can wear to school, even though "Paige wears them all the time!" After probably 30 minutes of hunting, discarding, and trying (the little ones apparently have round balls for feet, they all seemed to for the first few years), I did manage to find sandals for the 3 I was shopping for. Sarah and Evie each have really cute gold gladiator sandals and Jason has a good pair of basic blue - with velcro, which I am sure he will rip off his feet at the first opportunity. He even tries to take my socks off when he has a chance.

We made our way up to the check out with much ado - I think Sarah fell at least 2 more times, and William once or twice - and finally paid for our stuff. I'm looking around making sure I have everyone with me (Evie and William had crawled underneath the basket at this point and were curled up on the little 'shelf' there - I thought they were the older ones?) when some damn kind lady suggested I get a walking rope for them - as if they would hold on to it.

So in the end I came home with: the hand soap, the scrub brush, a battery that does NOT open my garage door, sandals for the kids, monkey slippers for Evie (because you need slippers in 90 degree heat) and a green blanket for William (probably just because it's green; and he badgered me to death.) I don't think I will attempt this again for a very long time ever.

I am now finished venting, almost finished my wine, and ready to go watch Desperate Housewives on Tivo (no commercials!) while my dear Hubby is 8 hours and 45 minutes into his 13 hour and 45 minute flight to Japan en route to Guam and is somewhere over the ocean off of Alaska's coast. Godspeed Matt, I love you.